My Solitary Comfort
by Alyssa Laine
Summary: Sirius is prone to fits of sulleness. Remus just wants to help. Things take an unexpected turn... RATED M FOR A REASON, PEOPLE!


A/N: Hello, Lovelys! Lovelies? Anyway. First off, I want to thank Ryan for beta-ing this. Secondly, I want to tell you that this is my first M rated slash story EVER. So I apologize in advance if you're dissappointed in the story at all. Next, I'd like to point out that Sirius does get a little whiny at one part. Just deal with it, though, I didn't know how to make it more in charater there. Last, I am warning you.

IT'S RATED M FOR A REASON!

If you don't like slashy, one-shot, Rem/Siri man sex, then click the back button NOW.

-Alyssa Laine

**XXX**

**My Solitary Comfort**

Remus wrapped his cold fingers around his warm ceramic mug of coffee. He stared into the rich depths of his cup, a contemplative look gracing his face.

"You okay, Rem?" said a strong voice behind him. Remus knew at once who it was, and crooked his head slightly to catch of a glimpse of the tall figure lurking in the shadows.

"I let myself in, Sirius, hope you don't mind," Remus said, turning his gaze back to his coffee. He took a swig as Sirius came up behind him and placed a firm hand on his shoulder.

"What's wrong, Remus," he said gently, rounding the table and taking a seat opposite him.

"I'm fine, just a bit tired is all," Remus said, endeared by Sirius' concern. He looked up at the character in front of him. His eyes, though, must have given the semblance of unease.

"If you're worried about something, Rem, you can tell me," stated Sirius evenly.

Remus took a long sip from his cup and brushed the hair out of his face. He eyed Sirius for a moment.

"It's you."

"Me?" inquired Sirius. "You're worried about me?"

"Yes," Remus declared. "You're living like a recluse. You wish people were here, but when they are, you lock yourself in a room and talk to a Hippogriff."

"So you think I'm insane," Sirius laughed bitterly. "I daresay Snivelly's convinced everyone of it, hasn't he."

"No," Remus corrected gently. "I think you're lonely. I think you've been lonely for a very long time, and you just don't know how to cope."

"That's why you're here? To help me '_cope_'?"

Remus raised his cup to his lips. The bittersweet coffee had lost some of it's heat, but he continued to drink it just the same. He shrugged. "Yes, I suppose."

"I don't need help 'coping', Remus, I'm just fine."

"Sirius," Remus laughed, "I've known you for over 20 years. Do you honestly think I wouldn't be able to tell when something's wrong by now?"

"Known me for 20 years, eh? I assume you're counting those 12 years in prison, the 12 years when you didn't know me at all." Sirius stood, knocking the chair to the ground as he did so.

"Sirius!" Remus called as the raven-haired man stormed out of the room.

"Leave me alone, Remus," Sirius bit off his words.

"Padfoot, don't be like this, I'm trying to help," he called up the stairs as Sirius stomped to his room.

The portrait curtains flung open and Mrs. Black began screaming, "Shame of my lineage, unworthy to inhabit the Noble House of Black! Dirty half-breeds and dishonest scum…"

Ignoring the distasteful rant, Remus ran past her up two flights of stairs and out unto the landing. He strode to Sirius' door and knocked twice, entering before Sirius had half a chance to answer.

"Sirius, what the bloody hell is wrong with you?" Remus said angrily, closing the door beside him. Suddenly everything was silent. Sirius was sitting on the edge of his bed, head in his hands.

"I'm not a recluse, Rem. I just hate being here. I hate this house. I hate this room. I hate that fucking portrait! I ran away. I thought I was gone for good, and now I'm back. And I'm stuck."

Remus sat beside Sirius, the bed sinking slightly under his weight.

"Sirius, I didn't mean to make you mad, I just… I know how you feel, Padfoot. I was alone for nearly thirteen years, starting when James and Lily went into hiding, and we turned on each other. You were my strength, my last leg to stand on, and suddenly, you were Voldemort's right hand man. Since then- since you went to Azkaban, I've been alone, hoping it was all a nightmare. I had no friends, no family. You were _all_ as good as dead. I've been there. I've been lonely. And what I needed then, more than anything, was for someone to care. I don't want you to think that no one cares. I care. I'm here for you."

Sirius leaned into Remus and, placing his hand on Remus' face, guided him into a soft kiss. Sirius pulled away to look into Remus' eyes, where lay a tempest of jumbled emotion, confusion and desire. Remus battled with what to say or do next.

_This is wrong_, he wanted to scream, but all his voice could manage was, "Sirius." The man beside him settled his hand on the nape of Remus' neck, inclining his head ever-so-slightly; waiting. Their lips were just inches apart. Remus could feel Sirius' eager breath mingle with his and linger on both of their mouths, warm and ceaseless. A part of Remus tried to move, to leave, to feign that something was amiss and this was corrupt, wrong. But the other part of Remus that lusted and loved and felt and knew better, leaned in and pressed his lips against another man's.

Sirius deepened the kiss, tracing his tongue along Remus' lips, entreating feverish entry. And Remus obliged, returning the favor in the process. Remus reclined back unto the bed under the avidity of the kiss. Sirius was positioned half over him, his lips lingering for a moment longer on Remus' and then working their way to his neck were the sultry man sucked and kissed and nibbled.

Remus moaned in ecstasy, Sirius' fervid kisses ravishing his skin, "Ohh… Sirius. This- This isn't… right. Oh, Sirius."

Sirius' expert hand began unbuttoning Remus' shirt as he leaned in for another torrid kiss. Remus closed his eyes and savored the sensation of lips on lips that he hadn't felt in so long. He brought his hand to touch Sirius' cheek, and the kiss intensified, both men filled with need and desire. Sirius brought his leg over Remus and straddled him, resting on his knees on top of the werewolf.

Sirius broke the kiss, removing his shirt in one swift motion. Remus took considerable notice of his slim, strong figure. Sirius bent back down, his long hair framing his face perfectly, and placed a small, tender kiss on Remus. And then another, his hands roaming over Remus' exposed chest.

"Sirius… this… we can't…" Remus panted.

"Remus," Sirius said quietly, still placing docile kisses all over Remus' face. "I love you. You know that."

"I… love you, too, Sirius. I love you, too."

"…I know," said Sirius, brushing the sandy blonde hair out of Remus' eyes. Sirius looked into the eyes of the man beneath him, and unrestrained passion surged through him. Sirius' hands were lingering on his waistband, very close to a more than obvious bulge. He stood quickly and undid the button and zipper, sliding his pants to the floor. Remus watched as Sirius undressed, reluctant to do the same, yet eager all the while.

"This isn't normal, Sirius," Remus said clearly, sitting up. "We have to stop. We're two men."

"Do you think I haven't noticed? And when have _you_ ever been normal?" he said in a husky voice. He returned to the bed, his boxers significantly tented. He ran his hands over Remus' shoulders, slipping his shirt down his arms and unto the bed. He threw the shirt to the floor, pushing Remus back down with the ardor of the next kiss. Sirius laid on top of Remus, bare chest on bare chest, both hearts thudding madly and their breathing heavy and uneven. Sirius kissed his way down to Remus' waistband, where he skillfully slid the man's pants off of his body revealing Remus' distinct arousal.

Sirius moved up on his lover, and they kissed lasciviously. Their man-hoods rubbed against each other through the thin cloth, making Sirius groan in pleasure and anticipation. They both hastily removed their last bit of clothing, kissing each other, all doubts inexplicably erased from Remus' mind.

Sirius' hand trailed down Remus' stomach and began to caress Remus' erection. Remus moaned in bliss as Sirius slid down took Remus' cock into his mouth, caressing and sucking. Remus sunk his fingers into Sirius' black locks as the man began to lick and suck more devilishly.

"Uhn, Sirius," Remus moaned, his back arching against the bed. There was a coiling tension building inside of Remus, hot and erotic. He twisted his fingers into Sirius' hair, the pressure throbbing through his member.

"Oh, God, yes!" Remus screamed as a blaze of euphoria washed over him. His head hit the pillow in satisfaction. Sirius kissed his way up Lupin's body eagerly.

"Sirius," he moaned between heated kisses. He felt himself grow hard again, wondering how he could yearn for Sirius again so soon. Sirius' cock was pressed against his inner thigh. Sirius grabbed Remus' hands and stood, urging him to do the same. Lupin stood and Sirius pressed his lips on Remus'. He turned so that he and Remus were facing the bed. Remus' mind and pulse were both racing. Sirius was standing behind him, his sweaty chest pressed against his back. Sirius' arms encircled Remus' chest gently. He leaned his mouth on the crook of Remus' neck. He licked and bit Lupin's tender skin, giving him goosebumps.

He buried his length into Remus up to it's hilt, making both men groan. Remus put his hands on the bed in front of him making it easier for Sirius to start thrusting. Grunting and groaning, Sirius pushed into Remus. Remus curled one hand around his cock and started rubbing himself, his rhythm following Sirius'.

"Remus!" Sirius cried out as he came, exploding inside of the werewolf. Remus felt Sirius come and it sent him over the edge as well.

Both men collapsed on the bed, panting and drenched. They crawled beneath the covers, staring lovingly at each other. Sirius and Remus cradled each other, their chests rising and falling rapidly. Lupin smoothed the hair out of Sirius' face and placed a kiss on his forehead. He closed his eyes, wrapped in the warm embrace of Sirius Black, their naked bodies pressed together- both of them completely content for the first time in a while.

---

"Mooney," Remus heard somewhere in his subconscious. He shifted in the bed, willing himself not to open his eyes. A pair of lips pressed themselves against him.

"Remus, wake up," said a husky male voice. The werewolf opened his eyes to see Sirius standing by the bed completely naked and going through his drawers for clothes. The events of last night came flooding back to him. He blinked, adjusting his eyes to the light. Was it real? He lifted his sheet slightly making sure that it wasn't all some sort of fantastical nightmare. He was naked, too, and unsure if that was a good or bad thing. He closed his eyes, last night replaying in his mind. Sirius' lips brushing his, Sirius' weight baring down on him, their chests pressed together, hands and mouths roaming each others bodies. It was incontrovertible. He had slept with a man,

"Are you alright?" Sirius asked, zipping up his pants and sitting on the edge of the bed. Remus looked at him silently, afraid of what he might say if he opened his mouth.

"Remus?" said Sirius, stretching his hand across the bed and reaching for Lupin's. Remus drew his hand away.

"This is beyond wrong, Siri."

Sirius smirked.

"I mean it!" Remus said indignantly.

"You meant it last time, too," he said, barely concealing a smile. "And the time before that, and the time before that, and--"

"I really do mean it, Sirius," he said, "This is wrong. We can't do it anymore."

"It's not wrong," Sirius corrected, "You love me, and I love you, and we can do as we damn well please. The only person you're trying to convince is yourself. Stop trying to push me away." He leaned, wrapping his arm around Lupin's neck. "Stop over thinking us, Mooney. We're good for each other." Sirius kissed him gently. He stood, looking at the ground and picked up Remus' pants, tossing them on the bed.

"Get dressed, love, the Order will be stopping by in an hour."

Remus got out of bed reluctantly and slid his pants on. He threw on his shirt as he and Sirius exited the room.

Mrs. Black's protrait curtains were hanging limp on either side of the frame, but the mad old woman was not screeching like usual. Sirius and Lupin passed the protrait, noticing her look of complete disgust.

"That was… nauseating," she said to her son, "Next time, _please_ use a silencing charm."

Remus walked into the kitchen blushing wildly. Sirius was just laughing.

---

:D endd :D


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